When we fall short

The painful feeling that you are bad — unworthy of love and belonging.

Often confused with: Guilt, Humiliation, Embarrassment

Treating yourself with the kindness you'd give a friend — especially when you fall short.

A defensive armor that says 'if I look perfect, I can avoid shame and judgment.' Different from healthy striving.

The feeling that you did something bad. Holds behavior against values — usually motivates change.

Often confused with: Shame

Feeling put down or made to feel small in a way you didn't deserve. Unlike shame, you don't believe it.

Often confused with: Shame, Embarrassment

Fleeting self-conscious discomfort when caught doing something silly or awkward. Usually passes — and is even funny later.

Often confused with: Shame, Humiliation